Where's My Money Tree?

“Don't you worry there my honey

We might not have any money

But we've got our love to pay the bills”

That was some of the lyrics from the song “You and I” by Ingrid Michaelson. Hmmm…Can you survive on love alone or is it all about the money, all about the dum dum dum dum dum dum?

I posted the lyrics on my FB status and I’ve got some interesting comments. Some went “aaaaaawwwwwww…” but others have pretty strong opinions about how important money is and that you can’t live on love alone. To each his/her own I guess. Some people are fairly content earning less income in a job that they love like working for the NGOs. Some doesn’t mind slaving themselves in the office for a 5 figure salary. Is there a balance to all of this?

We are presented with choices everyday when it comes to earning or spending money.

If you were given a choice to work overseas like in Sudan or Iraq and earn a 5 figure salary but your spouse refuse to come with you, would you still go ahead and accept the job? Would you be willing to leave your spouse and kids behind? Some would say you’re being very noble to make that sacrifice for your family. But is it worth it? Are you being noble or selfish?

It’s all comes down to making the right decision for yourself. I know we can’t live on love alone. That only happens in a fairy tales. But I would like to think that I would rather live moderately and enjoy the simple things in life than working to death just to earn a 5 figure salary.

At the end of the day, you won’t be able to enjoy all that money anyway if you’re forever stressed out. Your partner will also be stressed out looking at you stressing out. You would eventually drop dead. And that ain’t fun at all.

Have a good weekend everyone!

Rest in Peace my beloved Tok Yang

I lost someone very close and dear to me 4 days ago. My grandmother or Tok Yang as I fondly called her had passed away on Monday the 27th October at the age of 76. She wasn’t sick or anything like that. In fact she looked really healthy when we had our family gathering the day before. She was eating and laughing. No one would have thought that she would leave us all so suddenly like this. Even my grandfather was in a state of denial for a while. He couldn’t believe that his beloved wife had passed on before him. She and Tok Ayah had been married for 60 over years and they have 13 children of which my mother was the eldest.

My Tok Ayah looked so lost after the funeral. He was crying all the time. Sometimes he forgets that his wife had died. He would asked one of us to ask Tok Yang whether dah masuk belum waktu Zohor/Asar/Magrib/Isya’. He depended on her for everything. I don’t know how life would be like for him after this. My Tok Yang was a very strong woman. She was the one who took care of Tok Ayah, bathed him, cooked for him and was his companion.

My Tok Yang had a heart problem but we didn’t think that was the cause of her demise. On the morning of the 27th, around 2 a.m. she woke up and told my aunt that she was hungry. So my aunt fed her quaker oats. She was purging for a bit and had difficulty breathing. My aunt had telephoned my mom to ask her to come over to the house so they could take Tok Yang to the hospital but it was too late. By the time my aunt had gone into the room to ask her to get ready, she had stopped breathing. She looked so peaceful and serene.

You know how sometimes when people know they are going to die they would do or say things out of the ordinary? My Tok Yang told her children that this year was the best raya she ever had because all her children and grandchildren went back to Sg Petani to celebrate raya with her and that this year would probably be her last raya. But of course no one wants to hear things like that so they told her, “Jangan merepek la Mak” and they believed that she was going to live forever or at least for a few more years. I mean no one wants to think that their mother is going to leave them right?

My Tok Yang loved her jewelleries especially gold. Most old women do I think. But my Tok Yang told my mom that she was going to return the gold necklace that my aunt bought for her as a raya gift because she felt that she had no use for them anymore. We ignored the sign.

My Tok Yang loved her garden and her fish pond. Whenever she was supposed to come to KL for a check-up, she would remind my uncle who lives nearby to come to her house everyday to water her plants and feed her fish while she was away. She would remind my uncle a million times and would call him everyday to remind him. She would do this everytime without fail. My uncle told us that the day before she was supposed to leave for KL, she didn’t even call and ask my uncle to look after her garden. My uncle said that it was like she didn’t even care what happened to her garden while she was gone. Again, we ignored the sign.

None of us had a chance to say goodbye to Tok Yang. But one thing I know for sure is that she knew we all loved her very much. She was the glue that stuck everyone together. And now she is gone forever.

Al-Fatihah to my Tok Yang. Tok Yang, we love you and we are going to miss you so much.

Yoga Is Dangerous?

Seriously???? Isn't it just a form of exercise? This was reported in The Star newspaper today. Hmmmm..what next huh?

Thursday October 30, 2008

National Fatwa Council to make a ruling on yoga

GEORGE TOWN: The National Fatwa Council will soon come out with a ruling on yoga exercise.
The Islamic Development Department’s deputy director-general (operations) Othman Mustapha said the council’s chairman, Prof Datuk Dr Abdul Shukor Husin, would make the announcement.

Othman told reporters this after opening the two-day seminar on Islamic Jurisprudence and Eternal Islamic Thinking at Universiti Sains Malaysia here yesterday.

On Tuesday, lecturer Prof Zakaria Stapa of Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia’s Islamic Studies Centre advised Muslims who have taken up yoga to stop practising it as it could deviate from their belief. – Bernama

Horatio Caine...the man we all love to hate

1) Only a man like Horatio Caine could defeat a group of Mala Noche Gang Members in Brazil all by himself and then flew to Miami and arrived fresh and relaxed at the same time.

2) No one can do a one-liner better than Horatio Caine, with style too I might add.

Alexx : What I'm saying is I'm not an anthropologist. It could be a large woman or a small man.
Horatio : You know what they say "You lie down with the Devil (paused and then puts on his sunglasses), you wake up in Hell".

Suspect: Can I go now?

Horatio: Let me see how should I put this... No!

Det. Frank Tripp : It’s not looking too good Horatio.
Horatio : On the contrary (paused and then puts on his sunglasses), we are going to find her.

Det. Frank : They call it speed dating. Our victim has 15 dates.
Horatio : Well you know what the say Frank (paused and then puts on his sunglasses), speed kills.

Alexx : He died hours before this accident ever happe.
Horatio : So an accident (paused and then puts on his sunglasses), is not an accident at all.

Delko : He might be trying to get our attention.
Horatio : I don’t know (paused and then puts on his sunglasses), but he just got mine.

3) No one puts the sunglasses on better than Horatio, right on cue as well.

I cannot stand Horatio Caine because he is so perasan bagus!!!!!!!! Arrgghhhhh! Rasa macam nak take his sunglasses and then pijak-pijak and buang dalam gaung. And what's with the posing senget every single time?????

Sigh...Horatio, Horatio...what are we going to do with you?

Of Kek Lapis and Lemenet Overdose

Someone told me that “sheep go to heaven and goats go to hell”. I don’t know why he suddenly blurted it out to me. I swear that line was from a song but I can’t remember what song it was. Why indeed do sheep go to heaven and goats go to hell?

Why do people get sick right after Hari Raya? Most of my family members inclusive of hubby (though I think his is more of “demam rindu” than anything else) and my colleagues and friends are having fever and flu, headache and/or cough. Too much unhealthy food you think?

I had a pleasant raya in Kuching.

I’ve never seen so many kek lapis before, in different colours and shapes. I've tasted ALL of them. Cannot resist la. When I see the nice colours and shapes of the cakes, I feel like I just have to taste them. Hehehe...Just don't ask me what they're called coz I don't know. I only know a few like Horlicks Chocolate and Ati Parek.

I also drank this bottled soda drink called “lemenet”. Don’t ask me why it’s called that. I asked hubby and he too doesn’t know. He said everyone called it lemenet since like forever.

Check out the size of the pulut panggang. Giler huge kan? This was taken at Pasar Satok.

Hubby's mom makes the best laksa sarawak. Hubby had polished off 3 big bowls of it!

Another sarawak delicacy. Acar cicah with keropok. I was jakun at first coz usually you cicah keropok with chili sauce but this one cicah with acar. Once I've tried it, I was hooked. It was really good!

Guess what they sell at the shop? Hehehehe...You'd be surprised....

So how was YOUR Hari Raya?

Of Being Together

It’s just 4 more days to Hari Raya and 2 more days before I fly off to Kuching to celebrate Hari Raya with my in-laws. I won’t lie. I’m not looking forward to spend Raya away from my family but Hubby said something to me last night that made me feel a little bit better. He said that he and I are a family now and it doesn’t matter where we spend Raya, be it in Kuching or Sungai Petani, as long as we’re together, that’s all that matters. He’s right. I wouldn’t dream of spending Hari Raya away from him just to be with my family even though I love my family to death. He also told me he understands my reluctance and sadness but I should not let it consume me and stop me from having a good time while I’m there. He said I should not feel guilty if I happen to enjoy my Raya in Kuching because I will be around people who love me and are excited to show me how Sarawakians celebrate Raya. I felt so much better after hearing all that from Hubby. Thanks sweetie.

On another note, I realised I only received 4 Hari Raya cards this year. I received one from my jeweller, one from my dentist, one from my optometrist and one from my ex-uni mate. Wow! Hehehe…I guess it’s good that we’re not sending anymore raya cards because we will save more trees. I know my colleague Nina would be happy that I don’t go around sending raya cards anymore like I did the previous years because she’s such a tree lover and god knows how many trees I’ve killed over the years.

With that, I would like to wish all my wonderful fellow bloggers Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri and Maaf Zahir Batin. Kalau buat open house janganlah lupa jemput I okay :)

Please have a safe journey home to your kampong. Service your car beforehand and make sure you have enough coffee to keep you awake while driving. Or better yet, get plenty of sleep the night before your journey.

Heartbreak Hotel

“If it's a broken part, replace it.

But, if it's a broken arm then brace it.

If it's a broken heart then face it.”

Jason Mraz said those words in his song “Details in the Fabric”. Well, Mr. Mraz, it’s easier said than done. You can’t replace a broken vase that is 100 years old and was passed down to you by your late great-grandmother.

Same goes with a broken heart. You can’t immediately face it. You need time to swallow all the hurt and bury yourself in it before you can even get up again. You need time to make sense of it all, of the hurt you’re feeling and asking yourself how to ever trust another human being with your heart again after this.

Some men take up to a month max to wallow in all that hurt. Usually they will stay cooped up in the house sleeping and maybe crying their eyes out silently of course, and then after a month they’re already out there partying and going out with different girls every night. And they may have forgotten all about their broken hearts. Or maybe not and they’re in denial.

Not so with women though. We take a very, very long time to heal. We go through different phases of healing to mend our hearts. The first phase is the “crying our eyes out”. It’s non-stop morning, noon and night. We only stop crying when we go to sleep, even then I’ve seen some friends sobbing in their sleep after a fight with their bf. I’m amazed at the amount of fluid women have when it comes to crying. I mean we usually don’t eat and drink during those “mourning” period but the tears that come out can fill a whole bucket a day. That’s why women usually loose weight during these periods. I lost almost 30 kilos so I know what I’m talking about. Anything can trigger it off. Sometimes even when we don’t feel like crying, we would still make ourselves cry by listening to those sad love songs. We inflict pain on ourselves to numb the pain that we’re feeling in our heart. Does that make sense to you? We can’t move to the next level until we have cried our hearts out.

The second phase is the “getting rid of all the things that remind us of the bastard”. Oh don’t take offence guys. All men are referred to as “bastards” after a break-up especially if it’s a bad break-up. Throw away all the mixed CDs the bastard has ever made for you, throw or give away all the teddy bears he has given you, tore up all the love letters and birthday and anniversary cards you’ve ever received from him and cut out the bastard’s face from all the pictures of the two of you together and then burn them. Oh don’t get me wrong, the crying still hasn’t stopped of course but all above needs to be done to accelerate the healing process.

The third phase is probably the most effective one to heal a broken heart and a phase that every woman usually goes through. It’s the “calling all your girlfriends and then bitch about the bastard while eating a tub of Baskin and Robbins” phase, even if the break-up is not 100% because of the bastard. Like who cares? It’s good to get it all out in the open. Even the way the bastard chewed his food will be discussed here and bitched about. Nothing is spared. And I mean N.O.T.H.I.N.G. From the top of his head down to his tiny foot thumb. Ahem. Oh we would still be crying our hearts out when we think about how sweet the bastard can be sometimes like cooking our favourite dish and bringing it to our office when we had to work late. The crying will stop immediately and replaced with anger when our girlfriends tell us that there is a possibility that the bastard could be cooking the dish for some other bitches and not just you.

The fourth and the final phase is getting out of bed and thinking it’s not the end of the world, that you’re better off without the bastard and there are other fish in the sea or better men with bigger foot thumb out there for you. It takes a lot of courage and strength to get to this last phase. With the help of family members or a dad who promised to shoot the bastard if he ever sees him and very close and wonderful girlfriends, one will get through this painful experience and move on.

With that experience, women will be more guarded with their feelings and tend to build a wall around them. That is usually why we take a longer time to fall in love. Some women will swear off men for good while some will make it harder for the next man who is trying to court them. In any case, I will tell these women it’s good to be guarded and careful but that is not how we should live for the rest of our lives. When the opportunity to fall in love knocks on your door you should at least peep through the hole on the door. And if you like what you see then open the door a little bit, get to know the person on the other side. After that if you still don’t think he’s the right one then simply chase him out and slam the door shut. Trust me, the door will be knocked on again. In any case, just trust your instinct and have fun. That’s all you can ever do anyway.