Friday, March 31, 2006

Selamat Pengantin Baru my dearest Leen...

My best friend, Leen is getting married today. To a wonderful man, Azrin.
Congratulations Leen & Azrin.
Leen & Azrin,
Many people are going to give you advice on how to live, how to love and even on how to raise your children. I am going to give you advice on the path to a happy successful union, with just a few suggestions (not that I am an expert on the subject but I've lived long enough and heard too much to know it doesnt hurt to follow these advice).
Azrin, you need to sharpen your skills on … MIND READING…At no time and under no circumstances will the female let the male know what she wants.
The car is empty … Go fill it up. The bin is overflowing … go and take it out. The lawn is overgrown…. Go and mow it.
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it, whenever you're right, shut up.
The best way to remember an anniversary is to forget it just once.
Never be afraid that Leen will leave you, she has spent years training you and she won’t give that up lightly.
Woman do really need a pair of shoes for every outfit.
Remember Azrin that you can never ever be more tired than Leen. Foot massages and back rubs must be performed on demand!

Leen, you need to remember… Men never need to ask for directions – they just drive around until they find the place.
Don’t mess with the remote control – it’s a guy thing.
Never interrupt a man whilst he is watching his sport.
Men and their gadgets – we’ll never work out why?
But on a more serious side :
Always love each other. Always respect and be there for each other. Remember that a husband and wife are indeed best friends. For good friends, come not with time, but with trust!
May the best day of the past be the worst day of your future.
May good fortune precede you;
May love walk with you.
May good friends follow you.
May you grow old together on one pillow.
Enjoy the moment…for as this moment is, may your life be…with happiness, love, excitement and children.
My love to the both of you.
Selamat Pengantin Baru Leen. Semoga Berkekalan Hingga Ke Anak Cucu.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Zap Zap and Awaaaayyyy!!

In a quest to have a body like Angelina Jolie and also because of an impending engagement, I decided to take a drastic measure yesterday afternoon.

I have been eyeing this product since last week when I was in Mahkota Parade in Malacca for the treasure hunt. When I came back from Malacca, I told my mom about this product and how I can loose several inches of my waistline by simply Zapping myself. No, it’s not an electric shock therapy. See, my mom believes that there is no easy way to loose weight and the only effective way was to EXERCISE. Urgh. How I dread that word.

It’s this new product by Osim called uZap. Imagine never having to do sit-ups anymore but still have that perfect toned tummy. Hehehehe...It zaps away unwanted fats at your tummy, buttocks, thighs etc. It’s a perfect product for someone who is allergic to “Exercise”. Yes, simply saying the word “Exercise” gives me hives. The guy who sold it to me said that I would see the result in 3 weeks time. It cost me blardy RM698!!

“Ah Beng, if I don’t loose 4 inches of my waist in 3 weeks time I am coming after you and I am personally going to Zap zap away your balls.”

So last night, I had zapped myself for 20 minutes. Every part of my body (ermm the upper part especially) was jiggling. It’s like they have a life of their own or something. So after the massage, I felt a little bit itchy around the tummy and a little sore (Ah Beng said it was a natural reaction, he better be right!). It’s too soon to tell whether this uZap thing works or not but I guess you’ll only find out in 3 weeks time.

What a woman wouldn’t do in the name of beauty. Sigh.