Thursday, August 09, 2007

If you're happy and you know it....

I've got a lot of reasons to be happy about this week.

  • Hubby has got a new job. He tendered today. Yayyyyy!!!! He no longer has to deal with that biatch boss of his. Good luck in trying to find someone as hardworking as my husband, u bitch! Hubby will be working in one of the telecommunication company in a month's time. He's been miserable for so long in his current job. His boss is one crazeeee woman! This month alone 3 people (including hubby) have tendered their resignation in his dept. 2 person tendered because they couldnt take it anymore and they haven't even found another job before tendering. So you have an idea how psychotic his boss is. His boss gives bad rep to lady bosses everywhere. She's temperamental, shouts at her subordinates in front of everyone in the office, gives a direction then gives another contradicting direction and when her subordinates ask her to check whether what they're doing is right, she would instead yell at them for asking her and tell them that they should know what to do but when a mistake is made she would blame them for not asking her in the first place. See what I mean when I say she's a nutcase?
  • My company is organising its family day at....SUNWAY LAGOON this Saturday! I'm bringing my nephew Hareez and I'm counting on hubby to babysit him while he's in the pool. Hehehe...I haven't figured out what to wear yet. Do they allow tshirts in the pool? Hmmmm...
  • I'm so excited about my upcoming trip to Cherating next weekend. I'll be going there with 4 of my friends together with their hubbies and children. My schoolmates and I (SMDJ rules!!!) would organise a trip once a year. Meeting up over coffee during the weekend is not an option for us as each of us is pretty much busy with work and other commitments. One friend is working in a Ministry in Putrajaya and her boss is known for not approving her leave at the very last minute (don't you just hate bosses like that?) and the fact that he allowed her to take leave to come with us to Cherating is like a miracle. One friend is working in a merchant bank in KL and her boss is also from hell. He would take credit for the work that she does and depends on her to feed him information everytime before a big meeting. One friend is working in a private firm in Rawang and thank god she has got a fairly OK boss. Another friend is not working. Full time that is. She's doing her PhD in biochemical something something and working as a part time lecturer in Kuantan.

So there it is. After I wrote everything I realised that I wrote more about bosses from hell than news that made me happy this week. Hmmmm...Oh well, sod it. Have a nice weekend everyone!

Monday, August 06, 2007


It’s so hard to maintain friendships nowadays.

Sometimes things we say which is meant as a joke could be construed wrongly and the other party gets hurt by it. Believe me, once it is spoken, damage is done and there is no way to take it back. For people who forgive easily, whose heart could not fathom of holding grudges for a long time then it’s easier to ask for forgiveness. But for some whose hearts are like stone, it’s not that easy. It could take days or even years for them to forgive you.

No matter how many friends you have, you could never be perfect at maintaining friendship.

A friend forwarded an email on friendship and it said,

“A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself”
I remember there was a point in my life when I felt alone, I had just broken up with my 1st ex who happened to be my very first serious boyfriend and it was my very 1st serious relationship. My self-esteem was very low, I felt unwanted and not worthy of being loved. I felt that the reason he broke up with me was because my family wasn’t as rich or esteemed as his, that I wasn’t as pretty as all the other lawyer chicks that he was befriending at that time and that I didn’t possess the same level of intellectual as he did. Friends were consoling me and telling me what a prick he was. That anyone would be lucky enough to have me as their girlfriend as I was smart, witty and that I have a great personality. Of course I didn’t believe a word they say. In my heart, I thought they were only saying all this to make me feel better. I’m not saying I don’t appreciate their kind words but after a while you tend not to believe it even though you know they have got your best interest at heart.

While I was feeling all sad and worthless, a friend, R, said that if I thought I was ugly then I should change the way I look. If I thought I was fat then I should loose some weight. She said, “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, you will achieve.” (I later asked her where she cedok the corny lines from and she said it was from Salt N Pepa...haha...).
R didn’t try to console me by singing praises to me. She said only I can get back my self-esteem. Only I have the power to make myself feel better. She stood by me and never let me give up. I would wake up suddenly at night and feel like crying my heart out and I would call her and she would just listen. She wouldn’t offer any advice unless I asked for it. Whenever I was whining about never finding a guy that could love me like how my ex loved me, she would tell me to shut-up and stop feeling sorry for myself. It was brutal yeah but it was the best thing she could've said to me that point in time.

R is now married with a daughter. We haven’t spoken for quite sometime but we know deep in our hearts that we are friends for life. We don’t talk for 3 months and when we talked it was as if we’ve just spoken to each other yesterday. She is the kind of friend that “You can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation that you ever had.” To me that’s the best kind of friend. I could always trust R to tell me the truth even when it hurts. For that I would always cherish my friendship with R until the day I die.

Do you often asked yourself what kind of friends that you would like to surround yourself with? Obviously not someone who punishes you when you don’t call but someone who understands that sometimes it’s just hard to catch up. Someone who understands that being married and having children is not an excuse for you to drop them out of your life. Someone who understands that just because a friend is single and you’re married, you never try to marry off your single friend and think that’s what they want too (unless they specifically ask you to set a blind date for them).

So you see, friendship could easily break down when both parties do not understand each other. When there is a breakdown in communication or when one party just do not bother to make the effort. When this happens, it’s better to just let go. There is no point in trying to fix the friendship when you’re the only one putting in the effort. Some bridges just need to be burned and not worth salvaging.

So I say, make new friends. I know for a fact there are plenty of nice people out there. You just have to make the effort. Strangers could surprise you sometimes. You never know until you make that first step.