Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The "Eeekkk" Song

The boyfriend sent me this song called “Selimut Hati” by Dewa 19 a while back. I didn’t really listen to it properly then because…well, it is not one of Dewa 19’s most popular song. So this morning he told me that he had e-mailed this song to me again and wanted me to listen to the lyrics. He said that he meant every single thing that was said in the lyrics and that he sometimes feel like it too.
I will produce the lyric for you guys here. I think the song has a very nice melody but at the same time, reading in between the lines of the lyrics I feel bad because I think the boyfriend thinks that I compare him to my last ex-bf, which I don’t! Honest!

Aku kan menjadi malam-malam mu..
Kan menjadi mimpi-mimpi mu..

Dan selimuti hatimu..yang beku..
Aku kan menjadi bintang-bintang mu..
Kan s’lalu menyinarimu..

Dan menghapus rasa rindumu..yang pilu
AKU BISA UNTUK MENJADI APA YANG KAU MINTA..

UNTUK MENJADI APA YANG KAU IMPIKAN..
TAPI KU TAK BISA MENJADI DIRINYA (see what I mean?)
Aku kan menjadi embun pagi mu..
Yang menyejukkan jiwamu..

Dan ‘kan membasuh hatimu..yang layu
AKU BISA UNTUK MENJADI APA YANG KAU MINTA..

UNTUK MENJADI APA YANG KAU IMPIKAN..
TAPI KU TAK BISA MENJADI DIRINYA..
Tinggalkan sejenak lalumu..
Beri s’dikit waktu..
Kepadaku..tuk meyakinkan mu..
Aku kan menjadi malam-malam mu..
Kan menjadi mimpi-mimpi mu..

Dan selimuti hatimu..yang beku..
I want theboyfriend to know that I don’t want him to be someone he’s not. I don’t want to change him (although I did manage to change some of his annoying habits like singing out loud and waving his hands frantically in the air and moving his body in the car while driving. Malu orang tengok okay! But I let him get away with it sometimes, when he’s usually stressed about work).

I want him to know I love him the way he is. I mean that’s what made me fall in love with him in the first place right? I don’t want him to feel insecure about how I feel for him.
How can I assure him that he doesn't have anything to worry about?
My last break-up was not one of those bad break-ups where we can’t even talk or see each other’s face. He didn’t cheat on me and I didn’t cheat on him. We didn’t have a big fight. We broke up because he was of different religion and was not willing to convert. He had a lot of issues. I respected his decision. I don’t hate him. I don’t want to be with someone who is forced to convert just because he wants to marry me. I was angry at him but I don’t hate him. After the break-up, he went off to do his Masters degree in Australia for 2 years. He is now back in KL. He now has a girlfriend and I am happy for him. He calls me occasionally (like once a month) to say “Hello” and I appreciate that.
So you see, I think the fact that I didn’t have a bad break-up worries theboyfriend. I think he thinks it’s abnormal NOT to hate an ex-bf.
Is it normal NOT to hate an ex, isn’t it?