My aunt, a 49 year old widow came to the house a month ago and told us that she is getting married again. She told my dad (her brother) that she wants to get married to her old flame, a 65 year old man.
Her husband-to-be is an Indian convert. They wanted to get married 25 years ago but my granddad was against them getting married because he wasn’t a Muslim. So they parted ways but I was later told by my aunt that the guy had never stopped loving her. However, he got married to another woman and my aunt too got married to another guy 20 years her senior. She got married to her 1st husband (now deceased) only after my granddad had passed away because my granddad didn’t like the guy either. My granddad was a very hard man to please. But I guess he only wanted what’s best for his daughter.
After her 1st husband passed away from a heart-attack 4 years ago, I thought my aunt would never remarry. She really loved my uncle and couldn’t cope with his death. My aunt became distant from her children and fell into depression. It wasn’t the “I-want-to-commit-suicide” kind of depression but it was more of a “I’d rather not deal with anything and continue with my life by watching lots of television” kind of depression which is even worse.
I just received a telephone call from my mom and she told me that I needed to rush home after work today because my aunt is getting married at the house tonight. Hubby was also summoned home ASAP as my dad needs him to re-arrange the sofa i.e. heavy duty lifting is required.
The last time I spoke to her children they told me that they hated the guy their mother wanted to marry and was against the marriage. One of her children is sitting for her SPM exam this year and she said if her mother were to marry this guy then she would purposely fail her exam. My aunt’s eldest son was so angry at my aunt that he refused to come home from college for 6 months now and refused to talk to my aunt. I told my cousins that it is normal to feel that way but they don’t have to worry because no one can replace their dad and that they need to understand that their mother may be lonely, hence that’s why she decided to remarry. Then one of her daughter said this to me,
“Why would mama feel lonely when she has us? Aren’t we enough? Adik is still in primary school. She should focus on taking care of Adik. Apesal mama gatal sangat nak kahwin?! ”
I seriously don’t know how to answer that question. How do you explain something like this to a child?
The thing is, even after finding out that her children are against the marriage, she still wanted to go ahead with the akad nikah tonight. She said that rarely a person gets a second chance to be with their first love. On one hand I can understand how she feels but on the other hand I can’t help but feel she’s making a big mistake. It’s like she doesn’t care what her children think, as long as she can be with the guy then that’s all that matters.
I seriously hope my aunt is doing the right thing.
Now I’ve to rush home to help my mom with the ceremony. I’ve to stop by Restoran Ismail in TTDI to buy 20 packs of nasi briyani for the guests to eat tonight. Sigh…so much drama la…
Her husband-to-be is an Indian convert. They wanted to get married 25 years ago but my granddad was against them getting married because he wasn’t a Muslim. So they parted ways but I was later told by my aunt that the guy had never stopped loving her. However, he got married to another woman and my aunt too got married to another guy 20 years her senior. She got married to her 1st husband (now deceased) only after my granddad had passed away because my granddad didn’t like the guy either. My granddad was a very hard man to please. But I guess he only wanted what’s best for his daughter.
After her 1st husband passed away from a heart-attack 4 years ago, I thought my aunt would never remarry. She really loved my uncle and couldn’t cope with his death. My aunt became distant from her children and fell into depression. It wasn’t the “I-want-to-commit-suicide” kind of depression but it was more of a “I’d rather not deal with anything and continue with my life by watching lots of television” kind of depression which is even worse.
I just received a telephone call from my mom and she told me that I needed to rush home after work today because my aunt is getting married at the house tonight. Hubby was also summoned home ASAP as my dad needs him to re-arrange the sofa i.e. heavy duty lifting is required.
The last time I spoke to her children they told me that they hated the guy their mother wanted to marry and was against the marriage. One of her children is sitting for her SPM exam this year and she said if her mother were to marry this guy then she would purposely fail her exam. My aunt’s eldest son was so angry at my aunt that he refused to come home from college for 6 months now and refused to talk to my aunt. I told my cousins that it is normal to feel that way but they don’t have to worry because no one can replace their dad and that they need to understand that their mother may be lonely, hence that’s why she decided to remarry. Then one of her daughter said this to me,
“Why would mama feel lonely when she has us? Aren’t we enough? Adik is still in primary school. She should focus on taking care of Adik. Apesal mama gatal sangat nak kahwin?! ”
I seriously don’t know how to answer that question. How do you explain something like this to a child?
The thing is, even after finding out that her children are against the marriage, she still wanted to go ahead with the akad nikah tonight. She said that rarely a person gets a second chance to be with their first love. On one hand I can understand how she feels but on the other hand I can’t help but feel she’s making a big mistake. It’s like she doesn’t care what her children think, as long as she can be with the guy then that’s all that matters.
I seriously hope my aunt is doing the right thing.
Now I’ve to rush home to help my mom with the ceremony. I’ve to stop by Restoran Ismail in TTDI to buy 20 packs of nasi briyani for the guests to eat tonight. Sigh…so much drama la…