Thursday, February 04, 2010

Crap and other bullshit

I need to do something to cheer myself up. Everything just seems to either bore me or irritate me nowadays. My friends say maybe I need to get away so when I come back I will feel energised and refreshed. Yeah right! Like that is going to happen. Usually after you come back from a holiday, you need another holiday to recover from your previous one. It's neverending!

I am not suffering from depression. I live a well-balanced life I should think. But sometimes it is just so hard to get out of bed. What is wrong with me?? Even my husband could not cheer me up sometimes. It's just frustrating for me and for him too I guess because when he tells me something my mind just wonders off and i ended up not registering whatever he said. And that of course annoys him, which in turn annoys me.

I just have this feeling you I can't pinpoint what is bothering me but I just feel so bothered! Been feeling like this for a few weeks now. It's an annoying feeling to have.

Maybe I've been feeling this way because I'm turning 36 next week. On the 8th Feb to be exact. But the thing is I've never been depressed about turning a year older because I really believe that age is just mind over matter, you know if you don't mind then it won't matter?!

I think I am just afraid of getting older and not getting ever. Yeah, yeah belum rezeki lagi, I know the speech. It's just so bloody annoying when i think about it. It would be so much better if as we get older, our womb gets younger, don't you think so? Then I don't have to worry about all that biological clock is ticking crap.

Oh crap. I am going to be 36 next week and I am terrified. i am so bloody terrified. God help me please.

Wednesday, February 03, 2010


Roses are red
Violets are blue
The best decision I've ever made
Was by marrying you...
Happy 3rd Wedding Anniversary my dear husband...may we have many more anniversaries to celebrate...