Friday, March 20, 2009

Green-eyed Monster anyone?


L called and told me that a mutual friend of ours, K is having some problem with her husband. Her husband apparently had not “touched” her for 2 weeks now. This was not the first time K had complained to L. K had also confided in me a few weeks back that her husband never seemed to want to have sex with her. She said she tried everything to “seduce” her husband like wear sexy lingerie but her husband just ignored her and went to sleep. My friend K has been married for almost 5 years and she too has been trying to conceive. She’s frustrated because her husband is not doing his part in trying to get her pregnant. He’s been coming home late and when he gets home all he wants to do is sleep. K said there was never any problem before with their sex life.


K called L to tell her that she’s giving up on trying to conceive. L advised K to be patient and to sit down and talk about it with her husband. I have a theory but I don’t think I want to share it with K. L told me that she thinks K’s husband is getting “it” from someone else, that he’s having an affair because no man could last a week, what more 2 weeks without sex unless he’s sick and K’s husband is healthy as horse. I told L not to make any assumption because it’s a very dangerous one to make. L then went on to say that we shouldn’t trust our partner 100%. L said that she has been married for almost 7 years and still doesn’t trust her husband 100% even though her husband has never done anything to make her not trust him. She said she often checked his phone whenever he took a shower and checked his emails as she has kept all his password with her.


My husband often tells me he trusts me. That’s why he said he never asked me who had texted me whenever he hears the message tone on my phone. He said he believed me when I told him I’m going out with my girlfriends and never doubted my words. But I on the other hand told him I don’t trust him 100%. He said he knows because he knows my perangai very well. Suffice to say it has something to do with my upbringing but I won’t go into that. Whenever I hear the message tone on his phone I will ask him who it was especially if he receives them at night. I don’t care if people think I’m paranoid or I’m being a controlling freak. I know he has never given me any reason to not trust him but hey it’s better to be safe than sorry. I don’t think I’m that bad. At least I don’t check my husband’s phone, email or facebook account without his permission. Unless there is a reason for me to do so lah. Siaplah I don’t care, I would ask him for his password and if he doesn’t give it to me then I know something is up. Privacy schimacy. Hah!!!


Anyway, I would really like to know reasons why husbands don’t want to have sex with their wife, especially if the wife is ever so willing to do it. I often hear complaints from the men that usually it is their wives who refuse to have sex but what is happening to my friend is really puzzling.



14 comments:

kruel74 said...

Me think there must be something wrong. Don't wanna sex usually means he is punishing her for something. And just to tell you one...somebody you and I know is nearing divorce (which actually is a confirm thing) when she discovered a few compromising pictures of her husband when she found out he husband's password for FB, Myspace etc...tapi kan, kadang2 kan bukan tak nak setia, banyak godaan. But I tak lah... percaya lah ;)

Ms B said...

It could probably be what your friend thinks but sometimes, for men, when they are too consumed on other things ie a very important deal at work, they tend to neglect everything else (even a blonde bimbo!).

And sometimes... there is no spark anymore. You simply cant force it and there is no other woman/man involved. There are people who are so busy or not in the mood that they just cnat be bothered or very little or nil intimacy.

ps: ur posting is the opposite of mine. it seems ppl around me are getting way too much. *winks*

ardy said...

Just give her man a good suck while he is sleeping, and she will know if he is getting it from somewhere else. Somehow, women always know (especially if there is a slight difference in taste and texture).

Mrs.A said...

Rather than ASK whether there's anything wrong. SAY there is something wrong. Tell K that please. It might not be anything since it's just 2 weeks but just tell K to do it. Before things go beyond anything.

Huba-huba said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Acat said...

i think she shud stop assuming and ask aje. did the guy just ignore her all the time? or did he say he was tired? how come its easier to accept if a wife say that she's tired and easier to doubt when the husband say the same thing.

no man can last a week?? now that's debatable. most married men can at least tahan for at least 2 months without sex.

married couples with kids tend to go without for longer.

hehe heck. some don't even remember what sex was like before kids. hehe

j or ji said...

assumptions is the mother of all fuckups.

baru 2 minggu......

McDonalds said...

I agree with j or ji. Women are always over analysing things. Maybe the husband is fed-up because he thinks his wife wants to have sex only because she wants to conceive.

Anonymous said...

stress from work?

Cosmic_GurL said...

kruel - Serious?? Someone we know? Yeah yeah u mmg suami mithali :P

Ms.B - Hmmm...I nvr thought abt that...I just hope he's pre-occupied with work and not ermmm..with some blonde

ardy - hahahaha! I dont know how Im gonna tell her to do that!

Mrs. A - Yeah will do. Thanks babe :)

Acat - 2 months?? serious ah? Hehehe...tak seksa ke? Well, I dont know whether K has actually confronted her husb...

jorji - well, hanya org yang memikul tu rasa 2 weeks lama bro :)

McDonalds - I suspect that too...

Anon - Could be...

Anonymous said...

acat,
two months have to tahan sebab pompuan kena berpantang. anak punya pasal... lelaki mesti sanggup tunggu.

~jelly D

katakbesar said...

definitely, something is wrong
i.e. kalau tengah pantang pun
still ada cara lain gak kan ;)
yang ni plak.. normal situation
iskh.. tak logik

The Pisces Man said...

Define having sex... does it always mean 'penetration'?, since for some, due to their rather hectic and unpredictable schedules, passionately cuddling and caressing and hugging each other while on bed, gives them satisfaction, just as enough...

Anonymous said...

When a man isn't having sex with his wife, it doesn't mean he is cheating - in the physical sense, anyway. Extrapolating from personal experience, I would bet that many men masturbate far more often than they have sex with their wives.

It tends to get quite boring having sex with the same woman. Masturbation is quicker and much less work and the imaginary partners are limitless.

In fact, having sex once a month with a wife and masturbating twice per day in between is a pretty good balance.