Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Piece of Advice

  • There is no such thing as free sex. Eventually you pay for it.

  • Never judge people by who they date – your own sex life is confusing enough without trying to figure out everyone else’s.

  • Advice is like a sandwich. If you know someone is hungry, you can offer them a sandwich. They may even ask for a sandwich. But if you put the sandwich in front of them, and they don’t eat it, there’s nothing you can do. You can’t force someone to eat a sandwich.

  • Emotionally, it’s better to be homicidal than suicidal. When you’re upset with a guy, at least know which way to point the gun (hahahahahahah! this is good!).

  • Never ask a single person if they’re “seeing anyone special,” an unemployed person if they’ve found a job, or a married couple when they’re planning to have children. You’re not making conversation. You’re starting someone on the road to Prozac.

And my personal favourite...

  • Men aren’t stupid, and you don’t need a complicated set of rules to find a good one who loves you. Here’s the only rule you need: if a man loves you, he will do anything he can to keep you around. Anything.


-"A Total Waste of Make-up" by Kim Gruenenfelder-

21 comments:

Shopper Mom said...

Sher, I so agree with point #5. But somehow ppl tend to ask that kind of questions. Maybe they're trying to be polite and strike up a conversation, but in actually fact they are offending the person they're asking.

Angel Eyes said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Angel Eyes said...

If a man really loves you, there's nothing in this world he can't do for you.. believe me!

Sher, when can we meet up for coffee again eh?

=)

Oreos said...

this is good stuff. now i know where to come for good advice :)

zuhri said...

that last piece of avice is good. does it apply to women? how do u know that she loves you?

trueblue said...

Yes la..I can totally relate to advice #5. These people need to learn to be more sensitive.

I'm sure advice #6 applies to women as well. But to say 'anything', I guess there's a limit to it. Setakat yang terdaya la and depends on situation/circumstances

Cosmic_GurL said...

Shopper Mom - Yup yup. Msians tend to be a bit kaypohchi u know

Angeleyes - Right on! But smtimes got limit jugak I think.

Oreos - Hehehe..Wish I was that insightful but unfortunately not so much :p


Zuhri - I think it applies to both. Tepuk sebelah tgn tadak bunyi woooo :)

Trueblue - Yup yup. Imagine asking for the moon. hehehe

superdzu said...

hey dr phil..
good advice.
so now...my question is..
mana single men nya??
nak try your last advice tu.
ada free sample tak??

KaiserSoze said...

hehehe..ure rite about that dear..there's no such thing as free sex!..it'll haunt you later...

Freak & Geek said...

no. 5 is my fav! road to prozac... muahauaahuahauha...

Cosmic_GurL said...

Superdzu - Hahaha...theres no such thing as free sample darlin'! Single men nya ader. Kena lah tengok yr preference plak. It's not easy to be a matchmaker kay but I have a good track record...hehehe

Kaiser - Ill take yr word for it bruder :p

FnG - Hehehe..yeah I thought tht was hilarious too!

cikPijah said...

wohoo! great advise here. going to print it out and post it at the door on my room and my cubicle.. senang! takyah cakap byk.

sic6sense said...

what if the man loves more than one?

Cosmic_GurL said...

Cik Pijah - Hehehe..glad to be of help

Sic6sense - He can love more than one but make sure the house and the car is in the wife's name. The 1st wife I mean :p

lx said...

I like that sandwich analogy ... sometimes, people who don't want to eat it may complain about it as well, ie. why is it tuna and not salmon? very similar to people who ask for advice and then tell you you're wrong :-D

madnessinvain said...

Homicidal? Ayayayyayyyyiii.

Cosmic_GurL said...

Alex - Ure so right! Thts why I only give advice to my closest friend when it comes to matters of the heart. At least they know my intentions are good :)

MIV - Bang bang bang!

Desparil said...

i guess it works both ways.. kena quid pro quo..

Angel Eyes said...

what if the man loves more than one?

hmm.. tough question here.. but why must he luvs more than one?

Desparil said...

angel eyes,

that is not limited to guys, mdear..

Cosmic_GurL said...

Desparil - Yup ure right. Works for both

Angeleyes - Becos men think with his d**k? :p