Friday, March 03, 2006

Of Moving Out....

Last night I came back from work quite late and missed meeting up with Cik Pijah and gang at Mamak Bistro, Subang. Damn! Next time yeah Cik Pijah.

My colleague, Noobs told me that there was going to be a 'Malaysia Property Exposition (MAPEX) 2006 at Mid Valley Exhibition Centre (MVEC) from 3rd – 5th March and I thought it would be a good idea to check it out this weekend seeing that I may be getting married this year and will probably have to move out from my parents’ place.

So I had a long talk with my mom last night about my future plans i.e. getting married and all. My mom said that after getting married I should not move out yet and stay with them for a while until I can afford to buy my own place. At first that sounded like a good idea but after thinking about it I thought it would be better to have our own place since it would be easier and convenient for the boyfriend’s parents to stay with us when they come for a visit instead of putting up in a hotel. I then told my mom that I wanted to buy an apartment and move out after I got married and my mom went quiet for a while. She asked me why I wanted to move out so quickly and that she would miss me too much and the house would be very quiet without me around, who would she talk to, who would take her grocery shopping, who would make her tea everyday etc. When she was saying all that I felt so sebak and had tears in my eyes. I am very close to my mom. Since I am the only girl in the family and the eldest I guess it’s only natural that I am close to my mom. I am blessed to have such a wonderful and understanding mom. She was never the kind of mother who would nag you and pressure you to get married. When I broke up with my 1st and 2nd exes, she was very supportive and told me that I should take my time and don’t just pick the next guy that comes along just because I was getting older and felt pressured to get married. She never tried to set me up with any of her friends’ sons and basically let me make my own decisions on things concerning my life. And that is why I think she’s the best mom ever.
So it is going to be damn hard when I have to leave the house. I have a feeling…No, I know for sure that I am going to cry for a few weeks after I move out from the house. And after we get married, if the boyfriend say we have to move to Sarawak then I know I would cry for a whole year!!! Oey! To think that I may not be able to spend 1st day of Hari Raya with my family is enough to make me feel like I am not ready to get married. I did have this conversation before with the boyfriend and he said that it is normal to feel sad but once we have children I would not be thinking so much about being away from my family during Hari Raya because I would be busy with the children. Is that true? Somehow I dont think it will make any difference whether I have children or not. I would still feel sad. men and their logic. Hmmpphh!
Hmmm...I may need a lawyer to draw up a pre-nuptial agreement barring the boyfriend from dropping that sorta bomb on me during the first 20 years of marriage.

20 comments:

Cosmic_GurL said...

Zuhri - Yeah within Klang Valley but if ada rumah sendiri I have to cook every other day and I am so lazy to cook!! Hahahaha! oh yeah walking around naked in the house while vacuuming is sooo my thing u know!

Desparil said...

midvalley sure jam giler2..

popcornelvis said...

takutkan...
i mean when you get married then you have 2 families to think about.
and leaving the parents and pindah to your own house pun agak sedih jugak.

but then being naked all the time to vacuum and do your cooking sounds like fun.
what r u waiting for then...
gi cari rumah cepat!

Unknown said...

there are pros and cons to having a place to call your own and bunking with the parents.
as for me, eventhough there is my crib, its a compromise to get the hubby to go back to ampang weekly and then visit his side.so, most of the time, life is one huge travel.
but babe, take me on this, jalan berlenggang tengah rumah tersangatlah best....

Anonymous said...

DON'T LA MOVE TO SARAWAK !! :-((

i suppose that's what marriage is partly about, you doing your own stuff. like make decisions, bear expenses, didik anak... and like superdzu said, for independence..

find a property near your mum's house...? or next to it..? ;-) just DON'T move to sarawak k?

Cosmic_GurL said...

Desparil - Midvalley bkn ke jam everyday anyway?

Superdzu - Yup. Kena jaga hati both sides. When u buy smthing for yr mom u have to also buy for yr mom-in-law. Hehehe...suka jer u part2 naked ni ek? Now oso u can vacuum naked u know but in yr own room jer la

Izreen - Since bf's parents are in Swak, looks like we'd only be going back and forth to my parents house la every weekend kot. But Hari Raya tu yang tak tahan tu

Capn Oats - I pun tak nak pindah to Sarawak!!! I would miss hanging out with u gals. Plus theres no Chillis there! I would miss my Monterey Chicken too much! Hehehe..wei, property near my mom's house tu mahal la!

cpj said...

ala.. sedih nye.. staying at your own place is better but as usual we can't think abt ourselves only rite? hmm... for picture of last nite mengkopi, kindly go to wegra's

Freak and Geek said...

gal, i feel u when u wrote abt ur mom being supportive on the break up bit. My mom did the same. She was the 1st person to know abt my recent break up. That morning, she consoled and wiped my tears away.. she even asked me to take a day off from work and sleep/rest on her bed for the whole day juz to cry my heart out. She told me to juz relax, live my life to the fullest and not to worry too much on getting hitched. She even said, take ur time.. u'll find the one.
Mothers are angels eh?
Nway, sorry termelalut.. and the long entry..
I guess it's ok for u and her to feel sad on moving out coz in her eyes u r her lil angel. But i guess look at the bright side, u r looking fwd to live with THE ONE..to start a new life together.. isn't juz blissful?
lagipun bkn nya u nak pindah london ke paris ker.. taman sebelah ur parents house je kan?

Red Raven said...

Another pre-nuptial agreement? First was the PS2 and now this one? Are u sure u want that guy kah?

Cosmic_GurL said...

Cik Pijah - Yeah ure right. Bila dah kahwin I think you have to compromise a lot of things.

FnG - We have the best moms kan? Betul la..But I think if I told my mom ill be moving to London or Paris she'll be very happy coz she can visit me and go shopping like crazy! hehehe..She might even buy me the plane ticket!

Raven - Shouldnt it be the other way around i.e. he wouldnt want me coz there are so many rules? But yeah the answer to yr ques is i do want him :)

Crash Test Mom said...

hmm.. i wouldn't know cos i still see my mom every morning & night. :) yes, i am very attached to my mom too.
my own hse is only 5 mins away and yet it's still empty. the funny thing is, i'm the one excited to move into our new home while my hubby was the reluctant one. heran sungguh, i guess dia pun dah terattached to my family kot.

Cosmic_GurL said...

Shopper Mom - 5 mins away only?? Hehehe...Sepelaung jer tu. So whre do u guys normally have dinner? Yr mom will cook then?

[V]landa said...

i cant wait to get married and move out!

Red Raven said...

guess Sarawak dont have a lot of things but u really dont want to even consider mving to Sarawak is it? ermm...have u ever asked him if he miss his family or his mum? i mean is he closely knitted to his family?

Desparil said...

MV is jammed every day but the jam during MAPEX is worse. last year sampai bangsar, tau..

anyways, did you find anything? me wanted to go but got something else.


superdzu,

masak tu.. pakai apron la. nanti kena minyak panas karang..

suzequatro said...

me aint married yet but happy entering marriage life babe!!

Cosmic_GurL said...

Ylanda - Hehehe...that bad huh?

Raven - Mybe when im really really old and my kids are all grown up or if the boyfriend struck gold and we're filthy rich that we could come back to KL every other day in our jet plane then ill consider moving to Sarawak :)

Des - OMG!! We went to Midvalley
and it was so hard to get parking. We got few brochures and have identified few good locations. But the ones we wanted were waaaayyy above our budget! Hahaha...

Sooz - Thanks babe! :)

Angel Eyes said...

there are pros and cons, definitely.

same here, as the only gurl in the family, maybe it's a bit hard for my mom to let me go but i've been staying on my own for the past 4 years. dulu mmg nangis woo.. every nite for sure i'll cried but now, lonely no more. maybe am getting wiser now in life...

pre-nuptial? i dun believe in that laaa... hehe..

Cosmic_GurL said...

Angeleyes - I pun dont believe in pre-nup. It's all about compromise and communication kan?

Crash Test Mom said...

cosmic_gurl:
my maid cooks, we eat. :)